Special K lost her first tooth yesterday.
Yeah, I know that I am supposed to be happy about this. I know that I am supposed to be thrilled that my little girl is growing up but damn it I’m NOT! I’m not ready for her to be all grown up. My heart is still stuck on the days when Hub and I were so happy about that same tooth popping its shiny white head through her gum line. Now, those baby grins with two teeth are being replaced by toothless grins with holes where my heart should be.
I feel like this marks the end of a cycle for her, the loss of the last of the baby in her. No more, “Mommy Please”, just lots of “I got it” and “I can do it myself”. Pretty soon, she won’t need us at all.
She starts school in the fall. We registered her yesterday. (It was a pretty big day for her)
Everyone says that by the time your kids start school you will be so ready for them to go it’s not funny. That may be the case for Hub (since he has been the stay at home parent) but for me, it’s something different. I have been the working parent for her entire life. I have already missed so much and now she is moving into the care of yet another adult. I know that she will have loads of fun, make lots of new friends, yadda, yadda, yadda.. but I want my baby to stay home. I don’t want her to grow up so fast.
All that being said, I know that there is nothing that I can do to slow down time. I can’t put a brick on her head and stop her from growing. My head accepts that but my heart wants to bury my nose in her head and snuggle her close.
Instead, I sprayed a dollar with glitter and played tooth fairy.
Just sayin. Oh, and meet my family.
We are the real ones, not the cartoons, although I do understand if there’s confusion.
That’s me, up there in the right corner. I will admit that the picture is a bit old. I would also like to point out that, that photo of The Hub and I was taken the night we got engaged, at Lucky Chengs NYC- The Drag Queen Capital of the World! I was also 7 months pregnant at the time. Like I said, my family does things our own way.
The red headed beauty over on the left is the result. Our daughter Kayla, who is 5 years old. Yes, She is 5. I was there. I’m sure.
For those of you who don’t recognize them, the girl in the middle is Merida, star of Disney’s newest movie, Brave. Her parents King Fregus and Queen Elanor are wonderful. Best Disney Movie EVER!
The similarities are amazing. I don’t want to say more for risk of ruining the movie for those of you who haven’t had the pleasure. GO SEE IT!
(to help, I have put a click through link to Fandango in the pic)
In case you haven’t noticed, parenting is messy. When you combine that with starting a business, managing a household and trying to figure out what the hell the cats want, it can get downright overwhelming.
Fortunately for me, I quickly realized that not every woman is the vacuum in 4 inch heels and a hoop skirt kinda gal. Some of us are able to do the stay at home, play and snuggle all day thing. Some are more the fighter, survivor, just barely keeping my head above water kind of moms.
I am more of the expletive shouting, piercing and tattoo loving, “Don’t-bother-me-until-I-reach-the-next-save-point”, domesticated wild child type of mom.
My house is not clean 24/7.
I do not have dinner on the table every day by 6:30pm. (or 8pm for that matter)
Some days, the dishes in the sink stay dirty and there may even be crumbs on the floor.
I will sort, wash and dry but I WILL NOT fold!
I used to have piercings and purple hair. I still would if my career path didn’t require otherwise.
Despite these factors, my family is happy. We are well loved, thoroughly snuggled and laughter is usually the first sound you hear when entering our house. We are ok with the dust and the clutter. Our house is messy because we live in it. We like it that way.
That being said, my hopes, fears and expectations for this blog are a bit like my house. It will be messy, there will be clutter and things that don’t make sense. The cats will be featured and most likely in the way. Things will occasionally come out of left field, go flying past your head and land in the corner of your brain with a thump. There will be mention of bodily functions, inappropriate references and the occasional foray into the tremendous amount of Geekery stored into my brain (ok, so maybe not so occasional).
But you see, the thing is, if I do this right, it will feel just like home to you too…